Bring back clapping on airplanes

BRING BACK JOY

Despite my crippling flight anxiety, I’m on airplanes constantly. Maybe it’s the Sagittarius sun / Aries moon / Aquarius rising combo (an endless, airy searcher), or maybe it’s just that so many of my people live around the world and I work hard enough (and was born into a US passport) to have the privilege and flexibility to see them.

I find the process of getting to the airport, boarding the plane, sitting on the plane, and deboarding the plane to be a series of arresting moments. Especially now….I mean have you read the news? It seems to be a constant bombarding of issues at airports, on airplanes, and even after the airplanes. Its full of tragedy… especially the latest crash of the London bound Air India flight - which was hardly covered by western media. These travesties are really sad, really awful, and really scary! These are human beings with loved ones, on airplanes, flying for reasons like:

A vacation
To meet a baby
To see a loved one for the last time (yes, before they die)
To fulfill a lifelong dream
To say goodbye to someone, or a funeral, or both
For a wedding
To reconnect with old friends
To make new friends
For work (not fun)
For work (that is kind of fun)
Most importantly, for all of these, its to begin again and re-establish heartfelt connection with all living beings seen and unseen, and a lot of these trips kind of saved my life (kind of drama, but really true).

Really, traveling most of the time restores my faith in humanity in one way or another.

I’ve taken flights for all of these reasons, and more.

I’ve cried on flights, laughed on flights, and I think I have cried in almost every airport I have traveled to for one reason or another… and I have also sat next to many, many people who clap when the plane lands.

When I fly, I try and look like the infamous photo of Kanye West flying on Coach. (somewhat chic sometimes) giant hoodie, loads of compression socks/leggings (I am a bit vain, cancel me), eye mask, gloves, loads of lysol wipes, giant over the ear headphones, baseball cap, giant scarf wrap.

If you google “unapproachable on flights” you may see my photo. Its a type of armor I use when I fly, along with certain medications to “take the edge off”.

Despite this, I try my best to be kind. I often give up my seat, I always try and help people with their bags, and I also fully accept the help of strangers. I’ll let the parent with the child go into the (genderless bathroom might I add) bathroom ahead of me, if the person next to me is sleeping I’ll clear their trash, I really try to be a decent human, silently. I am a walking prayer, silently exuding lovingkindness.

The moment someone claps when the plane lands, I turn into the Evil Queen of Snow White. What the fuck is wrong with them? They are ruining the social blanket of silence that allows us to move efficiently OFF the airplane with their loud noises, happy tears, and quite frankly, their joy and gratitude to land safely at their destination to continue their travels. Disgusting! I am no longer a yoga teacher - I am a HATER!

But really, why do I think this act is cringe enough to justify my spiteful gaze and hate so strong I start sweating? When was I conditioned to feel this way, and continue to perpetuate this hateful conditioning?

Because even in moments like these, its sometimes easier to jump to hate (or seeing this as cringe) rather than take a breath and view this as something insanely beautiful and brave.

If I look at this person, they are actually the clapping prayer. The person who claps when an airplane lands, is cultivating and sharing bodhisattva. What an abundance of gratitude and confidence you must have to clap on an airplane. Its pretty metal.

When did being happy and joyful after a flight become infuriating? Somewhere along the way, we decided that clapping on airplanes was embarrassing. I did too. But now I think that’s actually a symptom of something much deeper, a fear of expressing collective joy. Somehow we became haters instead of joyers (yes I made up that word). That is so cringe!!

If I didn’t land safely on my last few flights, I wouldn’t have been able to make difficult choices to say goodbye to my dad as he left his early body, accomplish a childhood dream of seeing another part of the world, a spontaneous trip with a dear friend, see the BRAT tour, and meet my best friends baby.

What if these flights never made it?

I understand that we are born through the birth canal alone, and we will die, quite frankly, alone (I love you Pema Chödrön) but I do think that while we are living, we should clap for more joyful moments when shared with strangers.

Flying right now, or really doing anything with strangers can be viewed as a running a marathon with 6 injuries, or running a marathon with all of your friends by your side. Either way, you are running the marathon. I want to try the latter.

I want to be more grateful for the financial privilege to travel, to have a passport, and to be grateful for the confidence to take the risk and surrender control. I’ll clap for gratitude.

No, I don’t want to talk to strangers on an airplane, and I will still medicate myself, but I think I’m going to start clapping and break the electrocuting silence at the arrival gate.

I think if we start spreading more gratitude for joyful moments, and actually acting in the way of a true bodhisattva, we can make gratitude and joy NOT cringe and put down our armor. Maybe then we can soften the thick walls of mud that divide us and both see and feel the humanity within each other, by sharing the pure gratitude to arrive safely and to live another day and be on our way.

Let’s get hype for joy, break the silence, and be more grateful for these small moments with strangers. You don’t have to talk to your seatmate on the airplane (sorry that is kind of cringe).. but you can definitely share a gaze filled with gratitude, or even more hardcore, clap with them.

More kindness!! More clapping!!! Being a hater is NOT COOL.